But when my sister woke up, she seemed to have become a different person. I don’t know if it was because of the stimulation that she suddenly became mature and sensible. She even asked me very calmly why I didn’t save her many years ago.

This is an insurmountable gap between me and her. She has never been willing to talk about it, and I have never mentioned it in front of her, but I did not expect her to ask me so directly.

I thought about what I wanted to kill her, and I thought about what I almost did in my life that I could not save. I felt very guilty about her. I didn't want to lie to her anymore, so I told her what I thought at the time.

I thought she would scold me, but I didn't expect her to say she understood me.

Understand me, understand why I did that.

This world is selfish, and everyone can make excuses for what they do. Everyone feels innocent, but she says she understands me.

I suddenly felt that I was so guilty that I was so sorry for her and even wanted to apologize for death. I had never cried again for many years, but that day I held my head and cried out completely uncontrollably.

It was because of what she said that she understood me.

It was from that time that I had a different idea about my sister. In the past, I just regarded her as a sister, a child who needed my protection, but since then I felt that she grew up overnight and she became a woman, an independent woman, and she had a charm that others could not match.

I began to observe her secretly, and the more I observed her, the more I felt that her every move fascinated me.

But she is already married, and I know very well that she doesn't like me, and I also have self-knowledge that people like me are not worthy of her.

However, I couldn't control myself and completely couldn't control myself thinking about her. As long as I appeared in the same place as her, my eyes would always fall on her.

I even looked like a pervert, fantasizing about her lying beside me after taking off her clothes and she began to stay in my dreams.

There are many times, I want to tie her back and lock her in the room. I want to hold her, kiss her face, her mouth, everything about her, I am like a pervert, constantly thinking about her.

But I dare not do this. I think I am dirty and ugly. My approach is a blasphemy against her. So every time I face her, I am serious and no one can see my thoughts. I learned to hide myself from a very young age. But God knows, every time I face her, I have to endure the torture and struggle.

That day she lived here drunk and lived here. I felt that my heart was about to burn. I was even lying next to her without control. Every smell on her body fascinated me. I was almost going crazy. I wanted to lock her up like this. No one could find her. Only her and I were two people. I wanted to hold her and hold her all the time.

But in the end, reason defeated my crazy thoughts. I stabbed myself in the arm, and the pain finally made me awake, so I simply didn't do anything irreversible.

In such pain and struggle, I found that Lian Jingcheng began to investigate me with the police, and soon they discovered some doubts about me.

I know I can't hide anymore. Sooner or later they will find evidence of my attack on Baixue, and Baixue will also find that I once wanted to attack her, and she will definitely hate me.

But I didn't expect that before the matter was revealed, Bai Xue discovered my secret, the dirty and ugly secret that I had been secretly hidden.

That day, she stood in front of me and saw the girl who was dissatisfied by me leaving from her eyes. There was no moment when I was so desperate that my favorite girl actually discovered the most unbearable side of me.

Pain, discomfort, despair, but there is no way to hide.

We just met face to face, and I spread all my ugliness in front of her.

I thought she would look down on me and scold me, but I didn't expect her to say that I will always be her family, she would not despise me, nor would she despise me.

I don't know what it feels like to hear this sentence. It seems like I feel relieved, but it seems to be even more uncomfortable. I even thought that she might as well really scold me and make me feel better.

That is, at that moment, I figured it out that I should no longer escape, I should face everything I did, and I should let her know that I was the one who attacked her and wanted to strangle her to death.

So I hid in a place where no one was. I quietly thought about my life. Now I am very calm, without hatred or fear, and I am very calm about writing these.

And I also accept the upcoming fate calmly.

The diary ended here. Bai Xue closed the notebook and couldn't help but sigh in her heart. At that time, Yan Feibai probably didn't know that she was no longer Bai Xue in this world. He thought that all he had to face was the punishment of prison.

So at the end, he did not say goodbye.

No wonder when he knew that Bai Xue was dead, he would anger Lian Jingcheng and kill him. She could no longer interpret how desperate he was when he received the news. He had already thought about reflecting on himself and going to prison to clear his sins. He probably never thought that he would face him would be death.

She remembered that day, when he died, she asked her to live well. At that time, there was relief in his eyes, but also reluctance.

Thinking of this, Bai Xue felt a cramp in her heart, and she closed her eyes and slowly calmed down.

At this moment, the diary in his hand was suddenly taken away. Bai Xue turned around and saw Wei Jiaming appearing next to her. Wei Jiaming opened the diary and frowned when he saw the content inside.

Bai Xue wanted to snatch it, but Wei Jiaming raised his hand and hid it agilely. Bai Xue said dissatisfiedly: "Isn't it good to take other people's things without their consent?" Wei Jiaming finished reading all the contents in the diary before closing it. His expression was not too ugly, but his fingers holding the diary were pinched very tightly, as if he was trying to crush the diary.

He smiled and said to her, "I didn't realize that you, your righteous brother, still have so many ideas." He threw the diary on the bed, and pulled the tie apart with a rough movement.

Bai Xue could understand that it was a man who was so disgusted by another man thinking about his wife.

Bai Xue sighed and said, "Forget it, he is no longer here."

Wei Jiaming paused his clothes and sneered, "Then he should be glad, but fortunately he is no longer here."

Bai Xue: "…"

After taking off his clothes, Wei Jiaming sat next to her and hugged her in his arms. Without saying a word, he just stared at her.

Bai Xue was furious by his eyes and said to him with some trepidation: "Why are you still caring about these things? The dead are the most important, right?"

"Burn this diary." Wei Jiaming said.

Although he spoke easily, Bai Xue vaguely heard the gritting teeth in his words.

Of course, Bai Xue nodded obediently. Wei Jiaming felt better and picked her chin and kissed her on the lips.

I won’t go into details about what happened later, but Wei Jiaming did it very hard tonight.

The next morning, Bai Xue went to Yan Feibai's grave to burn the diary to him. His secret and his darkness disappeared with his departure. No one will know from now on.

After returning from the cemetery, Aunt Li told her that there were two letters from her on the table. Now that the communication is so developed, it is rare to communicate in letters. Bai Xue picked it up and saw that the letter had the words "Jewelry Competition" printed on it. It seemed that this was the result of the jewelry competition.

Bai Xue was a little nervous. She thought about the fact that she had not even entered the preliminaries of the jewelry competition last year. Bai Xue adjusted her breathing before she opened the envelope. She guessed correctly, this was indeed the result of the jewelry competition.

Bai Xue looked at the contents of the letter one by one. For a moment, she felt that she almost couldn't breathe.

First place!

She turned out to be the first place, she won the jewelry competition?!

Bai Xue was afraid that all this was a prank, so she hurriedly opened another letter, which was an invitation letter, and invited her to attend the awards ceremony.

The envelope had a steel seal, which was indeed sent to her by the organizer of the jewelry competition.

Bai Xue really couldn't believe that she actually won the jewelry competition championship.

After she returned to the room, she read the two letters back and forth, without letting go of a word. It was true. All of this was true. She really won the championship in the jewelry competition!

She did it, she really did it!

If she had luck in becoming famous in the first two times, this time she had gained recognition by relying entirely on herself and her own strength.

She can do it, she has the strength, she can do it! Her dreams from childhood to adulthood have finally become qualified to take root in the ground.

This feeling is indescribable. Bai Xue only felt her nose soreness, and a complex emotion was blocking her chest, excited, excited, joy, bitterness, intertwined and fermented. In the end, she cried out without control in her arms and held the letter and invitation.

When Wei Jiaming came back, she saw this scene. She sat on the bed, buried her head in her knees and sobbed. Wei Jiaming frowned and hurried over and asked, "What's wrong with you? What's going on?"

Bai Xue handed him the envelope and invitation letter. After reading it, Wei Jiaming said, "This is a good thing, why are you crying?"

Bai Xue had no choice but to answer. She couldn't explain her excitement to him. Wei Jiaming smiled helplessly, pulled her into his arms and hugged her. He helped her wipe her tears and comforted her: "You did Bai Xue, you are great."

"I know." She was not humble at all.

Wei Jiaming touched her head and said, "Do you know that I was attracted to you because you had this ruthless spirit, as if everything in this world would not hinder you. At that time, I wondered whether this ruthless woman would also have a gentle moment, what would she look like when she became gentle? Later I finally saw you and saw your gentle appearance, just like now, you acted coquettishly towards me in my arms."

Bai Xue looked up at him and asked, "I acted coquettishly in your arms, and then? Not as strong and brave as before, I feel that I am no longer attractive?"

He smiled and poked her head, saying, "What are you thinking about? You are even more charming like this, and I am glad that I am the only one in the world who can see you like this." When he said this, he had a kind of charming look in his eyes.

Bai Xue hurriedly moved her head away and said calmly: "This is almost the same."

Wei Jiaming asked again: "What about you, did you finally decide to be with me because you have a crush on me?"

Bai Xue sat up, looked at him seriously, and said, "You are handsome."

The smile on Wei Jiaming's face faded instantly. He looked at her with a smile on his face and said, "Did you like my skin?"

Bai Xue didn't say anything, and she picked her chin slightly, and her face felt a bit natural. Wei Jiaming snorted from her nose and said, "It seems that I have to thank my parents for giving me such a beautiful look, and I have to pay attention to maintenance at all times to avoid you from changing your mind in the future."

Bai Xue burst out laughing, "You are so handsome, you are so handsome, but there are so many handsome guys in this world, not to mention that I am not a fan of flowers. The reason why I chose to be with you is of course because of your charm."

Wei Jiaming did not look comforted, but said, "Who knows yours?"

Bai Xue came into his arms again and hugged him. Her tears had completely stopped. What she felt at this moment was satisfaction and happiness.

"Thank you Wei Jiaming."

"Thank me for what?"

"Nothing, thank you."

On the day she received the award, Wei Jiaming accompanied Bai Xue. Bai Xue wore a backless dress. The dress was very slim and perfectly outlined her curves. In fact, when she first chose this dress, Wei Jiaming didn't agree, thinking that the dress was too revealing, but seeing that Bai Xue really liked him, she didn't object anymore.

Bai Xue was sitting in the venue waiting for the award ceremony and felt in a fog. She always felt that all this was too unreal. She really couldn't believe that she won the design competition championship until the award presenter on the stage called her name.

It's true, all of this is true. She won the championship and can completely enter the industry of famous brand designers. It's fake to say that she is not nervous, but after so many years of hard work, she has already developed a calm personality when encountering things, because she realized very early that nervousness is useless.

Wei Jiaming watched her walk up the stage step by step. The skirt she was wearing was inlaid with sequins. The lights on the stage were shining. As she walked, the sequins were also shining, as if she had worn a pool of Milky Way on her body, and the stars in the sky became decorations on her clothes, and she was the goddess who came stepping on the light above the nine heavens.

She smiled and took the trophy to the audience. He could no longer hear what she said. All her attention was focused on her. She was elegant and beautiful. She was so amazed by the dazzling lights. Today, countless female celebrities in the fashion circle were present, but he felt that the beauty exuded by her confidence and charm overshadowed the light of all women. The female celebrities who had surpassed countless people in the audience were as dim as dust in front of her.

Suddenly, he felt ashamed of himself. Wei Jiaming felt inexplicably. He had always been above his eyes and was not an exaggeration to say that he was arrogant. But at this moment, looking at her on the stage, he felt inferior. He was even wondering how a goddess like her fell in love with him.

For several seconds, all his attention was focused on the woman on the stage, and even forgot to breathe. He was excited, because she won the award and was honored, because this charming woman belonged to him, and he was excited, because this woman could compete with him in all aspects, just like a chess opponent, and the same rank gave him the pleasure of challenging him.

He kept staring at her until she walked off the stage. He didn't hear anything she said to him. Later, she pushed him and he woke up as if he was in a dream. He heard her ask, "What are you thinking? Don't you congratulate me?"

He found his voice, smiled at him, and said, "Congratulations, I'm proud of you." He spoke calmly and his expression was very natural, but when she didn't see it, he quietly turned his head and let out a breath in secret.

She was very excited to win the award. She shared with him all the way back, how nervous she was when she first came on stage, and she said a lot of other things, but he was absent-minded. His entire attention was focused on her, and he had no intention of hearing what she was saying.
To be continued...